In October of 1834 Eugene also wrote to Father Guigues, OMI who was at Notre Dame de l’Osier, which was a retreat house. He wrote on how to treat visiting diocesan priests who most likely did not have the same level and type of formation being offered to the Oblates.
“My advice is to seem not to have noticed and to keep up the courtesies, at the same time changing nothing of what is upsetting them, in other words be ever more regular, ever more aloof from dissipation, from the style of life they have adopted; in the long run, you will win the support even of those who see in your way of life a silent condemnation of their own” (488: VIII in Oblate Writings)
The men coming to the house for retreat may not have had a Rule of Life like the ones the Oblates had – guidelines, structures and practices to help keep them on track.
Oddly enough I find myself agreeing with what Eugene has suggested. After all, we tend to teach and share what we know and live by – even if it can be new or unsettling to others. We need to remain true to who we are and who we have become in God.
There is more than once I have had to remain true to who I am with one or with several. It is then up to that person or persons to decide if they will like it, agree with it – or not. It may take perseverance on my part – but the reality is I can only be who I am. Anything else is a sham and will not last.
It is God who allows me to remain where I am and who I am and to just walk in that. And perhaps one day that person will stop spitting at me like a snake ready to attack and will say hello. I think that while God is holding my heart in his hands He is also holding the others.